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flowing into new regimes

by sonja berlin-jones

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WEDNESDAY 6 MARCH

oh lordy I like this one. It might just be a weird temporary chemical-imbalance in my brain right now but I actually find it quite moving. It's a slow starter and it always sounds like almost nothing much is happening and nothing-at-all is changing - though only I know that underneath it all there's masses of stuff changing - but it has all blurred into one thing and I might just as well have done that one thing - it would have saved a lot of time.

But what else would I have done today ? Life's still empty right now. It's almost impossible to believe that if my life ever fills up one day I might look back on these deserted months with any kind of fondness. You can make music. Or you can live the rock'n'roll lifestyle. It's hard to do them both at once. Unless you're Led Zep. Which I'm not.

But wouldn't it be great to be in e.g. the Incapacitants and touring the world - a different gig every night - maybe thirty people a show - just enough to cover beer and fuel and broken equipment - year after year - instead of making this homely "ambient" stuff. Sometimes I feel that if it's ambient then it can't be good. If it can be described as "ambient" then that means it's already dead.

I'd like to thank John Crewdson and David H and Bill V for recent support - the latter two not via Bandcamp fan pages and therefore I'm respecting their understandable possible desire to remain fairly anonymous. And thanks to ANYONE who ever listens or reads or visits or downloads - listeners are rarer than musicians nowadays. And if Herr Gruppenfuhrer Townsend of the DSS-jobcentre is reading this then a big Thank You to you too - your inability even to find me an unpaid shelfstacker position at Poundland is a huge service to Luddite Hyperminimalism and a bit of a compliment to my "peculiar inattentive non-attitude" - whatever any of that means.

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released March 6, 2013

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sonja berlin-jones Southampton, UK

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